Sunday, June 24, 2018

Parenting and Influencing


Parenting is a skill as well as an art. It may seem easier, but it’s the most difficult assignment/job in the whole world. Unlike animals, human offspring requires many long years of consistent struggle of nurturing, healthy growing environment, constant supervision and much more.

Additionally, parenting is not just about raising a healthy child. Realistically speaking, parenting is all about upbringing of a human being with a healthy body, along with a healthy mind, a person with integrity, a balanced personality with character, who could be beneficial for his/her family and society at large.
This picture of parenting comprises of two main characters, a father and a mother (parents). Both the characters have to act simultaneously in order to get the best results out of this portrait that they are trying to paint as painters of their family. Family means togetherness, sharing ups and down in the journey of life span, mutual understanding, and above all mutual respect for each other’s privacy and space at the same time. 
Unfortunately, families lack determining these vital blind spot moments, although living under same roof. However, family members living at distance from each other can still be together, connect, share, discuss, and spend time together. That’s the reason it is called a FAMILY.
Parenting and influencing are two different sides of the same coin. Influencing is all about role modeling. Generally, parents consider themselves as best care takers, guides, mentors and teachers of their children. Undoubtedly, this is good, but it is certainly not enough.  Influencing requires much more than just being parents.

Let’s flip this side, focus our attention towards our children, and understand what and how children actually think about us as parents. 
At younger age children perceive their parents as their care takers, they depend on their parents even for their trivial problems. By the time children start going to school, they prefer that their parents help them beyond their physical needs. For example, guide them in their homework, preparing for their exams, etc. Little later in life, children want their parents to be their best friends. Being best friend of your children means, by showing your love in these ways, sitting down with them, spending time with them, understanding their viewpoints, facilitating them in their life choices and decisions.
Our children are our future, and they are reflection of their parents. As a parent, we need to reflect upon our attitude towards our children. We need to think about that, are we giving enough time to our children? Or are we just covering up by giving expensive gifts to our children. Are we giving them a listening ear? At the time, when they count on us for guidance, or do we turn our faces away from them, by acknowledging our busy life schedules. All these small gestures count, and make a lot of difference in the life of our children.
Perhaps, we need to address that what we used to expect from our parents, when we were kids. This way it might become quite clear to us, how our parents were like, and how they reacted to our problems as their children etc. 

Having said that, parenting and influencing your children is a matter of commitment, being diligent, at the end of the day. 


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